Importance of good company: Things to keep in mind while choosing a friend in tender age

“A man is known by the company he keeps.”

Growing up, we all have heard this from our teachers and parents a hundred times. But we never knew the actual meaning of it until we were called “good students” or “defaulters” according to the group we chose to be part of.

Remember, those warnings from teachers when we were caught using abusive words to conform to the social group, we were part of Remember, idolizing a famous artist just because ‘my group likes it’?

The early experiences of ridicule, failures, triumphs, learning are directly linked to the type of companions we chose.

As a social being, there is a great significance of interaction in our lives. We share our thoughts, ideas and information by interacting. Interactions are the reasons for inventions. To make life a happy journey, we share our insights with those around us. We may prefer companions according to our taste and they eventually become the reason of who we are and what we will become.

Why is a good companion important for you?

A good companion is like water to your life because:

  • Best Stress Busters: They are the ones who are always there to lift you up, no matter how gloomy you are! They will do everything to cheer you up. Their companionship gets you rid of all the stress and anxiety, the moment they say, “Aal izz well” while giving you ‘jaadu ki jhappi’
  • Honest Feedback: Whether you tried some new dish or wrote something, they are the ones whom you look up to for the feedback. Without any shadow of doubt, you know they will never sugarcoat things to make you feel happy rather will suggest where you can improve.
  • Secret Keepers: You pour everything in your heart and mind to them without any fear of feeling judged or exposed. Who is your crush, what are your family problems, difficulties in studies, they know it all! You trust them and know that they will never expose you and will take all your secrets with them to their tombs.
    Best Cheerleaders: Good friends make you realize your true potential and always encourage you to achieve your goals. Even when the whole universe is conspiring against you, they will never leave you and face the situation with you! They boost your confidence by acknowledging your strengths and help you overcome your weaknesses. They ‘push’ you to overcome all the obstacles and are the happiest when you win.
  • Favorite Teachers: Many will tell you that a particular thing is wrong, but it’s only your true friend who succeeds in convincing you why it’s wrong! They not only show you the right path but also walk along with you. They make boring subjects interesting with their quirkiness. They inspire you every day with their vision and loyalty.

Now when you know the importance of good friends, here are a few recommendations you must keep in mind while choosing one for yourself:

  • Similar Values: Be friends with those who have similar values as yours and are as motivated as you in life because their beliefs & behavior strongly influence you. You may enjoy the diverse values but like-minded friends are like home, your comfort zones.
  • Common Goals: Having similar goals in life makes your friendship stronger and healthy competition helps you achieve bigger in life. Their thirst of knowledge helps you become wiser. After all, ‘Birds of the same feather flock together’!
  • Good Character:  Don’t compromise with the character of the person whom you will call a friend. If they don’t respect elders and show mercy to animals, don’t be friends with them. Respect, honesty and kindness are the important aspects of personality. If they don’t possess any, remember they are not the one!
    Supports You: A true friend stands by you through all your ups and downs and assists you in whatever way he/she can. For instance, remember Kamlesh from the Sanju movie? He stood by him when all left and played a major role in enabling him to get rid of the drug addiction. Such friends never leave you and are to be treasured.
  • Listener: This is the most important trait to notice while searching for a friend, whether they are speakers or listeners too? Friendship is all about sharing and it should be both sided. If your friend keeps telling you about himself/herself and refuses to listen to you, are they even your friend? They drain out your energy levels, it’s better to get rid of them! Remember a real friend not only speaks but listens too!

Knowing what you must avoid while making a friend is equally essential because we are motivated by the type of people, we spend our time. Go over the following suggestions:

  • Don’t fall prey to peer pressure: This is the age when you will have a strong desire to explore new sensations out of the adventure. Due to limited experience and underdeveloped decision-making skills, you may become vulnerable to negative peer pressure. You will lose your individuality in the process of adopting the way your friend dresses or talks. You may end up doing things you aren’t ready to handle emotionally, including sexual activity, substance abuse, thefts, etc.
  • No to abusive friends: A company of a person who doesn’t respect your feelings, time and your boundaries will never become your good friend! They will be supremely critical to anything you do and will make efforts to bring you down. They will try to dominate you, and in the end, you will give up to them. So be aware of such companions!
    Don’t think gossipers will be your great friends: You may trust them but are they worthy of it? They will show their concerns to know all your secrets and shortcomings and the next moment, boom! You are exposed to the whole world. All they care about is the ‘masala’ they get for spreading rumors. Never reveal your secrets to them!
    Online friends are cool but may make your fool: With the advancement of technology, social media has made it possible for us to interact with millions globally. You can make friends easily but don’t forget they may end up destroying you in ways you can’t even imagine. Be mindful of the information you share online. Just because a friend is very sweet and frankly doesn’t mean you invite them to invade your privacy. Some friends may actually be very good but always look for real interactions.

Friendship is a very beautiful relationship. And this journey becomes lovable if you have got a true friend otherwise you will only get disappointments if you make a mistake in choosing your friend.

Happy journey!

Report by: Ruqayya Asif

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